Haggis Eating ~ By Numbers?

It was the final of the all Scotland haggis eating championship. The aim was to eat as many haggis (what is the plural) as possible, without throwing up.

Competitors had been whittled down to a manageable number, but the two main contenders were Angus Ree, representing Fife, and Hamish Sefton, representing Aberdeen. Time had not been kind to Angus, who had won the competition on many previous occasions; competitive eating had taken its toll on his teeth, and he was left with only one. To compensate, he softened the haggis with copious pints of "heavy" (FSS will demonstrate correct pronunciation). Unfortunately this proved to be his downfall and after eating eight haggis Angus threw up and Hamish went on to eat one more and take the gold medal.

The rather cryptic, but admirably brief report in the local paper read as follows ~ Result of Haggis Eating Competition ~ 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9. An out-of-towner asked what this meant and was told "One Tooth Ree for Fife sick, Sefton ate nine.